Green Thoughts

• Tonight marked the return of Kendrick Perkins, as he played 17 minutes in his first game of the season. This was a shocker that caught me completely by surprise Most reports were that he would be back Friday or Saturday. With all things considered he played well collecting 7 points, 6 rebounds, and 3 assists. 
• Quick question, could the timing be any better? Kendrick's return gives the Celts a huge boost in toughness, size, rebounding, and hustle. A platoon of Shaq and Perk should be fun to watch. Not only does this give them one of the most physical center tandem's in the league. It also gives Glen Davis a chance to play far fewer minutes at center.
• Paul Pierce came out firing tonight scoring 17 first quarter points and 13 straight to end the quarter. He  capped off the run by sticking a jumper right in Joey Graham's eye.
• Cleveland blows. I haven't seen one person's departure cause this much damage since Oksana Grigorieva.
• Antawn Jamison is one of three players in history with 17,000 points, 7,000 rebounds, and 900 three's. The other two are Dirk and Scottie Pippen. All I have to say is one of these things is not like the others.
• The Cav's are so bad that the Celtics started the 2nd quarter with Rondo, Nate, Von Wafer, Harangody, and Big Baby, and the Celtics looked like the better team.
• The Celtics hit the road Thursday for 4 a game swing on the West Coast. This means that Tommy won't be yelling at the officials on air. Instead we get two of the four games with Bill Walton. This should be hilarious.
• This game was so boring there was nothing funny about it.

Top 10 Worst Haircuts In All Of Sports

After witnessing Kirilenko's monstrosity of a do last night. I started thinking I should do a list of the top 10 Worst Haircuts in sports. One stipulation is all players must be active. Without further a do the Rogues Lineup of the folically challenged.

10. Bacary Sagna

The Arsenal Right Back's middle parted blonde braids are truly horrific looking. I thought the French were stylish?
9. Brandon Jennings

This 80's throwback would make Big Daddy Kane proud. But it's not 88' and this haircut just looks stupid.

8. Tim Tebow

The former Heisman trophy winner looks like Frankenstein with his spiky jock mop. Seriously this haircut is so wretched that I'm not sure he looked worse after this rookie hazing incident.

7.Clay Matthews

My sister is going to kill me for this one but he looks like a member of your school's trench coat mafia chapter. His greasy blonde locks that fuel his Willow Smith style pregame celebration are only safe on a man of Clay's stature a vicious profession. Anyone else should get their ass kicked on principal.

6. Luke Harangody

Forget Tebow, Harangody is Frankenstein. Nuff said

5. Shawne Merriman

Steroids make you do crazy shit. This haircut would be one of them.

4 Ron Artest

This is just one of Ron's many haircut indiscretions Check out the google search for Ron Artest Haircut.

3. Andrei Kirilenko

I already stated my opinion yesterday on Kirilenko's flo-be. This haircut is just hilarious!

2. Steve Johnson

Merriman not only doesn't have the worst haircut on the Bills he doesn't even have the worst Mohawk on the Bills. He just looks stupid. Instead of blaming God on twitter maybe he should fire his stylist.

1. Jared Allen

 Where to begin.......Jared Allen's rocking 80's jock mullet is only rivaled in sports history by Jarimoir Jagr's in sports history. I think Jagr gets the age because he thought he was being stylish Allen thinks he funny. Or he thinks he's the jock in an 80's coming of age movie. In fact his hair is the second worst thing about the Vikings. The top spot isn't far away now that the worst is supposedly retiring. I also like that his hairline is receding it adds the touch of class that this mullet needs.

Green Thoughts

• Just when I thought Andrei Kirilenko's hair couldn't be worse than the spiked oddity he's had for the good part of his NBA career. He shows up tonight looking like a blonde cross between Adrian from Rocky and Tony Danza in his Who's The Boss hayday.
• Glen Davis leads the NBA in charges taken and has really elevated his game to a higher level. It's to the point now I think he could start at the 4 for most NBA teams.
• Deron had a rough night. He was the victim of a few rough calls early on and struggled to find a rhythm. I've been a big Deron fan since he came in the league and this was the worst game I remember him having.
• Why did Gordon Haywood leave school early? He played two years at Butler and was one of the great stories in college basketball in the past 20 years.  He could have been a superstar this year in college but instead he's riding the pine for the Jazz. Good Choice!
• Are the Jazz the whitest team in the NBA and is that by design?
• Paul Pierce is 4th on the Celtics all-time games played list and is rapidly approaching Robert Parrish at #3. Not bad this day in age where guys switch teams like I change underwear..... once every two years.
• Does Marques Daniels ever smile? But I guess I'm asking a lot for a guy with this tattoo.
• Great meaningless dunk at the end of the game tonight by Von Wafer. Guy has ups....
• Did KG look gimpy in his lateral movement tonight or am I just paranoid? He had a good game so I'm paranoid....I hope 
• Tommy I know Al Jefferson has all the low post moves blah-blah-blah. He's also out of shape, plays terrible defense, and admittedly has struggled to pick up Jerry Sloans offense.
• Speaking of Jerry Sloan there have been 430 or so coaching changes since he began coaching the Jazz. He's a very good coach don't get me wrong but is that a product of the city he coaches in or his ability?
• Celtics went 5-1 on the homestand.....Impressive
• Al Jefferson was 1-11 from the floor...yuck
• Is it me or does Kyrylo Fesenko remind anyone of the Lurch from Celtic Pride....give me the rock coach I got the Bad Crap....BTW Shooter Mcgavin from Happy Gilmore was the Jazz coach in that movie.
• Semih Erden has been the biggest surprise thus far this year. He's  also helping prove my theory that the 2008 draft was a very very good one. The big Turk was the last pick!
• Let's hope Shaq is OK and Perk gets back soon. Funny how those silly "where does Perk fit when he comes back" questions work themselves out.
• and in closing does Rondo look strange to you without a headband? Just saying....BTW he had another great game.
• I wasn't very funny today so here's a weird Finnish guy eating licorice

Dr. Footrub: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love The Idea of a Jets Superbowl Win

I want the Jets to win the Bowl....

That's right I said it. Though the thought alone might bring shivers to the cores of many lifelong Patriot fans such as myself I think it might be exactly what the Patriots need. Think about it every great hero needs to have a greater nemesis to defeat. Or at the very least an equal and believe me no matter what Jets fans tell you they won't be an equal (or a decent supervillian) until they conquer that obstacle. I mean think about it this team hasn't made a super bowl let alone won one since 1969. People were fucking without condoms in 1969! (except for sailors, who should  wear them dirty buggers they go from port to port ) Joe Namath has already had 800 knee surgeries, 400 refills of his Viagra script, and one very embarrassing incident involving Suzy Kolber. Dude I'm a father and almost 30 and my parents couldn't drive in 1969! But that's enough roasting of the Jets for now.

The Jets winning this years super bowl elevates the rivalry to Yankee - Red Soxesqe proportions. The Jets went out this offseason and did exactly what the Patriots did in the offseason going into 2003, 2004, and 2007. They identified and signed Veteran players that fit their scheme perfectly. They realized Thomas Jones had lost a step (or two) and had finally worn all the tread off his once dependable tires. So they went and brought in LT who gave them a versatile one - two punch they never had with a Jones - Greene combo. Both Jones and Greene are and were between the tackles runners. LT is not confined to that .He's a very good receiver and showed the burst to get around the corner that we hadn't seen out of him since 2006.  But LT wasn't their only splash, they brought in Antonio "8 seeds" Cromartie (who apparently thinks it's still 1969 or at the very least is a huge fan of ODB's philosophy on contraception), Jason Taylor, Santonio Holmes, and Trevor Pryce. In other words they brought in a veteran presence comprised of a group of veterans with a hunger for two things a ring and patriot blood.

 Remember when the Patriots did that? I can cite three specific seasons in which they did 03, 04, and 07. They won the bowl in two of those seasons and were a botched interception/ helmet catch away from the greatest season in the history of sports in the third (Fuck You Mercury Morris).  The team has been far more passive in the past three offseasons and have gone for a youth driven approach. Which has certainly worked some of the time, but not brought them to the promised land we have come to expect.

So I digress!

This a league where veteran teams win and the Patriots biggest problem might be their inexperience. So would a Jets Superbowl be the kick in the ass they need to go out  and show 03, 04, 07  aggressiveness this offseason? I think it would be and here is why, Belichick has shown in the past the ability to upgrade his teams to cover for weaknesses that cost him. Think the weakness of the defense down the stretch in 2002 which ultimately cost them the division and a wild card berth. So what did he do? He signed Rosie Colvin, Rodney Harrison, Ty Poole, and cut Lawyer Milloy. In 2006 the Patriots had an historic collapse in the second half of the AFC championship at Indy. A collapse which was personified by the drops and general lack of ability, depth, and firepower in their receiving core. So what did the hooded one do? He went out and collected one of the greatest groups of receiving talent the league has ever seen.

So do you really think a Jets Superbowl win won't inspire BB to go out and load up? I do

So this Sunday afternoon when you sit down with a beer and the intention of cheering on the team that inspired one of the worst hiphop songs in history. Ask yourself  is this good for Patriots?

I already have.......and Dr. Footrub and his gang green have my vote.